Highly Melanated Podcast
Hosted by PJ, Blair & Red A safe space for you to enjoy every bit of your melanin no matter how "melanated" you are in skin tone, we are ALL Highly Melanated.Come enjoy funny and dynamic conversations that people of color face on a day to day basis with various topics such as loving ourselves, knowing who we are as a people and uplifting each other with a mix of class and rachetness (CLATCHETNESS)
Highly Melanated Podcast
Staying Present: From Kegels to Living in the Moment
Ever wonder why a cup of coffee at your local café costs more than your homemade brew? Get ready to join us for a hilariously relatable start as we debate the merits of coffee shop prices versus our do-it-yourself coffee adventures. Meet the lively crew—BJ, Blair, and Red—as we share our experiences dealing with summer heatwaves, air fryers, and PJ's laughable $3,000 Amazon cart during Prime Day. We also tease an upcoming episode focused on the art of consistency, keeping you excited for more laughs and insights.
Next, we tackle the perplexing world of sleep during the pandemic. We dive into the age-old mattress debate: traditional spring versus the trendy bed-in-a-box options. With personal stories and online shopping frustrations, we reflect on how these choices impact our well-being. While steering clear of political landmines, we touch on how current events subtly influence our daily routines and mental health, creating a space for both serious reflection and light-hearted banter.
Finally, let's talk about living in the moment in our hyper-connected world. From setting boundaries with social media to understanding generational tech differences, we explore how to truly savor life's experiences. We share anecdotes about capturing life’s precious moments without getting lost in the digital shuffle, even throwing in a quirky tip like doing Kegels to Janet Jackson’s “Throb.” Wrap up with us on social media updates and exciting new ways to connect, ensuring you never miss a moment with the Highly Melanated Podcast. Peace, love, and remember to live your moment!
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Coffee does cost a corner in the corner store. For the coffee that costs that corner.
Speaker 2:I don't buy coffee at the corner store. I make it at home in my Nespresso. Excuse me.
Speaker 1:Let me just drink my coffee from this board against the city.
Speaker 2:Oh no.
Speaker 1:I really got to stop doing that shit, Like I got to clean up. What do you guys clean?
Speaker 3:them now. My life, my life, my, my whole. You know it'd be clean for two days.
Speaker 1:That sounds like about the average time for anybody yeah, two days and two days of me changing my clothes. Listen, listen, I don't know.
Speaker 3:Anyway, Bread and butter.
Speaker 2:Coffee costs a quarter on the corner.
Speaker 3:Coffee costs a quarter. Coffee costs a quarter on a corner.
Speaker 2:Coffee costs a quarter on the corner.
Speaker 3:You know, I don't think that I'll be thinking I don't have an accent, but coffee, coffee, coffee costs a quarter on the corner. You know, I don't think that I'll be thinking I don't have an accent, but Coffee.
Speaker 2:Coffee costs a quarter. On a corner Cost a quarter on the corner.
Speaker 5:Hey, what's up?
Speaker 3:y'all Don't do that Complete change it up absolutely not everybody's like confused. What, what am I listening to right?
Speaker 1:who are these people? Hey guys, hey guys, hey guys. Welcome back to another episode of highly melanie take two hey guys, hey guys, hey guys. Welcome back to another episode of highly melanated podcast after dark apparently after dark, in the rain, before the dark, when it's burning up. I don't know what it is, but I just love being black bj here what up doe?
Speaker 2:it's your girl, blair. You know, my melanin was poppin' yesterday, it's poppin' today and it's sure enough gonna be poppin' tomorrow.
Speaker 3:It's your boy, Red, and you're listening to the Highly Melanated Podcast.
Speaker 1:Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of highly melanated podcast, the safe space where it's okay to just stay up under your ac all motherfucking day not, according to con ed heat warning heated by if they send me one more Heat advisory email and or text. I got it, I might Wait. Okay, pj is excited. No, actually, you know what PJ swears. Now why can't I use words PJ has joined the Klan? No, wait. I was about to say now why can't I use words PJ has joined the Klan?
Speaker 3:No, wait, I was about to say not in this political climate.
Speaker 5:Please be gracious.
Speaker 1:No, pj has joined the rest of the folks and is playing around with his air fryer every day, all day. That's it red aka black red black freaking.
Speaker 3:It's hot, as outside I feel like I was in an air fryer, but I don't have one yet, so I'm going to go get an air fryer. It's Amazon Prime Day.
Speaker 2:Y'all Red black fried Blair, you know what I understand. It's all a gimmick for Amazon to just take more money from us, but I do appreciate that they do put the sale two days long, because everything that I forgot to get today I can get tomorrow.
Speaker 1:where oh, all right, okay, because I'm just you, I think I'm gonna go through my your way. You keep your um, we did. We talked about this before how you keep your your cart pretty much empty.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Oh, my cart is like $3,000.
Speaker 3:Why do you have $3,000 worth of stuff? What's in there? See, that was going to be my question of the week. Your question is that they pertain to you prospectively and introspectively. I'm glad that we got it out early. Let's talk to the person of interest right now PJ $3,000? Yeah, $. Talk to the person of interest right now pj three thousand dollars yeah, three thousand dollars you know what?
Speaker 2:you know that you can just create a list, right, and just add stuff to your list instead of adding it to your cart let me go in there right now and see what I got what is what like? Walk me, because you walk me through the process you don't know, you don't know I just see something you do. What do you do when you have to actually go and buy something?
Speaker 1:you can do all that other shit out of your car no, you just click deselect all items and then select shopping cart and then select the items that you want to purchase. Yes, I'm aware, I'm aware. And then when I go through my shopping cart now, half the things on the bottom of the shopping cart are currently not available because it's been sitting there forever I'm glad that you're, that you're letting the world know this delusional right let me hey, I could be a little delusional every now and again, can you?
Speaker 1:you know, speaking of being delusional, it's so interesting how we're talking about this, um, and I'm sitting here talking about red aka his name is black but there's an episode that's sitting in the wings that you guys haven't heard yet, where we talked about this, and that episode is about being consistent did we have this one actually like saved yeah? So-.
Speaker 2:Shots fired.
Speaker 1:Let me-.
Speaker 3:No, no, no, it's not, but it's not shots at him. I just really wanna know because oh, I know, I know. Look, I got all types of PTSD from that shape.
Speaker 1:No, it's saved. Oh, you mean saved like, not like. Oh no, no, it's saved. Oh, okay, I just no, no, it's safe. Um, okay, I just need to edit it. Um, but when I tell you it's been like I don't know how you guys, but since you jumped the question of the week, you trying to make me not ask how you guys have been. That's what you're trying to do.
Speaker 3:I see what you're doing I'm sorry, I just got excited we're talking about amazon prime stuff and then you said you had three thousand dollars worth of things that you're never gonna get. Actually, just because you didn't want not that you can't get them, that you just don't get them, because last week I was on a shopping binge.
Speaker 1:I got to stop. Okay, how come you don't?
Speaker 2:buy me nothing. Well, the reason why you want to shop a binge is because everything is in your fucking cart.
Speaker 1:I'll go through the cart first and then if I want anything that's in there and what lately so okay, so, okay. So if I want anything that's in there and what lately, so okay, so, okay. So extra questions what has been your, if anything at all, your recent like go-to purchases? Go-to purchase or my recent purchases no, just like things that you just need or want, or just want more of that you've been like wait a minute.
Speaker 2:I'm so sorry. I just had a whole idea for a different episode oh, ladies and gentlemen, we should all just like legit, like go through our amazon cart and like talk about, like our purchases that we've made over the last like year or whatever.
Speaker 3:My shit would be so fucking boring.
Speaker 1:I would love to do that. My stuff will be a little yeah all over the place.
Speaker 3:My shit is so fucking boring. My shit is mad, regular Like toilet paper, paper towel, like it's really like plain as fuck one once again.
Speaker 1:I don't know if I said this to you guys before. If y'all ever need, I have a costco membership. So, like, if you want to buy things in bulk, let me know, because that's literally that's literally what I've been doing. Uh, depending on who you are, shout out to you also listeners a few of you, um, that I do know that have been asking me to do this and I've been making a profit off of it. So you know, if you also would like to, um, you know there's no real markup, but there'll be a markup, but not for you guys.
Speaker 1:Just tell me what you want and I got you oh no, but to be honest with you, wait, say it again you were saying so wait, before I was.
Speaker 1:I was just saying how extremely tired and busy I've been and this heat is it has not been making it any better like I still am working on my client's uh audiobook, the guided meditation, and as I'm doing it every single time he puts me to sleep and hilarious, I mean it's great, like the stuff that he's doing is great. Um, but I also need to sleep. I'm like need a little rest because you know, I'm teaching a few new classes and a few with a few new organizations and driving and just when I was in Chicago last week I stayed at and shout out to the neighborhood hotel in little Italy.
Speaker 2:it seems like it used to be a um space, an office space that they took and then converted into, essentially, their apartments, but they're renting it out as a hotel. And let's just start with the bed. The bed was made of unicorn, clouded, I don't even know. The bed was freaking magical. It was so soft, so comfortable.
Speaker 3:The pillows, were like it was a unicorn cloud, okay.
Speaker 2:It was majestic, okay, majestic. So I get in this bed and immediately I'm like, oh, I'm about to have the best leap of my life, of my life. I promise you, um, this other hat that I do when, whenever I travel, I don't do it here at home because I literally, just like I have. I shout out to the girls who know you know, you know, you have a different bonnet that you have at home than when you're traveling. I have a different bonnet for when I'm traveling. It's not as big as my bonnet here at home. My bonnet here at home has an extra lip on it, so I essentially end up using that part as a sleep mask. So when I'm traveling, I have a sleep mask that I take with me.
Speaker 2:Um, so I knew I was about to get in this bed. I was about to put this sleep mask on and I was about to sleep all of my worries away and it was gonna be me. And I was right. And the freaking cherry on top, they had this. I have to see if this is on Amazon because, game changer, they had this white noise machine right next to the bed. When I tell you I'm, I'm, I'm a very light sleeper, um, and I typically wake up multiple times throughout the night, whether it's just to like move around or go to the bathroom or whatever like it's very difficult for me to like sleep in REM sleep for a solid, you know, eight hours, or whatever it is. It was the best sleep of my life. It was the best sleep of my life.
Speaker 3:You know, I'm hearing more and more that and I'm wondering if it's just us because we are who we are, you know, because we know each other and we're always busy.
Speaker 3:But I'm wondering if, like people in our generation or people in our particular age group or whatever group that you want to put us in, is having less and less sleep and trouble sleeping.
Speaker 3:Because even me, this past weekend, when I was with family, I went up to the poker and I was with family and I was kind of I had to kind of tell, not beat myself up because I knew I had this time where I now didn't have to work, I didn't have to do anything else, I could focus on content. But when I tell you the we were up there for four days, focus on content. But when I tell you the we were up there for four days, three of the four days I just sat there and just vegetated and was nodding off on the couch, going to sleep in the bed, nodding off on the porch, going to sleep in the bed, that's all I was doing, cause I guess I'm sleep deprived. So in that sense I I, you know, I try to make sure that. You know I'm not too upset, that like my body's just trying to rest. But I'm wondering if that's just like us or do we think like it's a bigger systemic thing? I don't know.
Speaker 2:It might be a combination of both, but I do definitely think that it is a characteristic of our generation, for sure, for our generation, right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and as you repeat it, I just want to just acknowledge the fact that you said our generation and then quickly said, or whatever generation we fall into, like I really think that you're picking shot fired again at me for being just like.
Speaker 3:I don't know what it was. Even thinking about you, sir, I'm just looking around.
Speaker 1:I'm like wait, wait, wait, but you know what it is like. I I mean, yeah, um, I'm thinking, I think that, and maybe this is just my experience, but I really do do believe that and maybe we should. It's it's. I know it's hard for me to get these words out sometimes. Um, it's not fair because it's been so long, but I think the pandemic still really has changed a lot of us, because I think the pandemic got us used to being home and naps became a thing. So, like the older you get now, like those naps, you become a little bit more dependent on it. Um, because I still like I literally normally when we record on tuesdays, and since I'm teaching double classes right before I get here, um, normally I'll try to take a nap in between.
Speaker 1:But because it was so fucking hot, I refused to leave the studio and I stayed there for a little while, um, until it, like, ok, I got to get back here so I can get here in time, because I just didn't want to walk out there and be drenched in sweat. But I do know that it's it's been harder for me to fall asleep, but I can stay asleep longer, longer. So, and maybe my mind starts racing a little bit more because of for me again, because of all the things that I know I should be doing instead of sleeping. But my bed is not as comfortable as it used to be, so I need a new mattress. So I want to know where you got where, where that unicorn mattress, where they got their mattress from. Let me know.
Speaker 2:Believe me, I'm going to try to find it it.
Speaker 1:I want to. I want to wonder what those like I really want to lay in somebody's mattress who gets in? Those who gets those mattresses that come in the mail like?
Speaker 2:I'm really curious about those those bed in a box mattress?
Speaker 1:yeah, I really want to know because I feel like you have to go right I feel like you actually really have and I think you should have to go to a mattress store.
Speaker 2:Maybe this is our old age Definitely showing your age, because those mattresses in the box don't even have springs. Our mattresses have springs in them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it didn't feel like it had springs when you first poured it.
Speaker 3:But do you want the springs or do you not want springs?
Speaker 2:You want the memory foam? That's what I'm thinking, see, okay, so then, do you do you want the springs, or do you not want springs? You want the memory phone? That's what I'm thinking see, okay.
Speaker 1:So then do you guys sleep like do you need a soft bed or a hard bed or a medium bed?
Speaker 2:I need something with support damn, showing my age too and I need, I need them. I need a meat. My bed is, it's a medium firm, but then it has like a pillow top on it, so I get it there's, yeah, pillow tops is.
Speaker 4:Port structure.
Speaker 2:is there Pillow?
Speaker 1:tops is a little old.
Speaker 2:Hey, look first of all Back in my day.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, this mattress is trash. Now, like I, I'm actually having back problems, so I do want to get another one.
Speaker 2:but Amazon, you can get you a little bed in the box please don't listen, don't tell me that.
Speaker 1:I mean I know I can, I just don't want to buy something and can't return it. I mean, or you can, but like it's doing all of that I'm keeping it. You don't have to buy something and can't return it. I mean, or you can, but like you can't return it.
Speaker 2:It's doing all of that. I'm keeping it, you don't?
Speaker 1:have to put it back in the box either. They're going to come and deliver it. I mean pick it up. They can come and get it. They can come pick it up.
Speaker 2:That's the whole. Thing.
Speaker 3:Amazon, we need you to respond now. We need a in a bed for our fellow hosts.
Speaker 1:You have 24 hours to respond.
Speaker 2:I don't know about through Amazon, but I know the whole bed in a box thing that's part of their selling point is you don't even have to put it back in the box, We'll come get it.
Speaker 1:But anyway. So how have you guys been Guys listeners? Because we never get it.
Speaker 2:Y'all try to avoid this question, so every time I think, I think we, I think we went over how we are. We're tired, we're crazy we're old we're irritable, we're so tired and we're looking for the deals on amazon, I think I didn't subscribe to the old label, but yes. We are showing our age. Let me say that.
Speaker 1:I don't think that's really showing our age, though I think that's showing you said that you think that you should go to the store and buy a mattress.
Speaker 2:You should have to go to the store and lay on the bed and test it out.
Speaker 1:You need to. You got to like lay on it, jump on it, bounce on it, you know.
Speaker 3:You know some Gen Zers like listen to us right now, ain't no Gen Zers?
Speaker 1:here Exactly Next channel I know who our demographic is. The numbers don't lie.
Speaker 2:So oh, other old ass niggas like us, huh, so everybody gets it they get it, they get it, they get it.
Speaker 1:um, oh my god, why? The first thing I'm looking up and of course, the on my roku, the, the screen, the screen savers portion, the Republican National Convention. We will quickly glance over this topic. We will not be really giving this man any type of day, but how do you guys?
Speaker 2:feel I, jessica Blair, tell you what I'm going to opt out of this portion of the conversation. I don't need nobody's government coming after me. Because I have several thoughts on the events that have transpired over the last year, and I don't need nobody knocking at my door.
Speaker 1:Wait, why do I keep seeing a lot more of that statement? I got a lot of thoughts, but I'm not saying anything.
Speaker 2:I have a lot of thoughts but I am not going to publicly, on any recording device, say anything.
Speaker 1:I do agree. I do agree. I mean, I don't believe it, but you know, I have a lot of. The only thoughts that I have right now is Amber Rose who says and here I am going to look at me Is this, is this really pop culture? But it's not. It's the way Blair just like fell out of the screen.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because some of it is not only surprising, but you're just kind of like where you're trying to wonder, like where people are going with it, but you're just kind of like where you're trying to wonder, like, where people are going with it.
Speaker 1:I know my, my only issue is my not my only issue, but one of my main issues of people who run these rhetorics about whatever, whatever bullshit you say without really doing any source of research. Um, when you say that something is all love or whatever, as far as you know, you look there up and it's all love. And the Republican whatever is all love. And I talk about any general party. But it's interesting how all love is equivalent to transgender bands and banning books and turning around same sex marriages and also trying to continue to police women's bodies. But hey, that's all love. Do you know that's?
Speaker 3:That's all love. I will. I will say this, though and's all love. Do you know that's? That's all love I will. I will say this, though, and I don't know, I'm not saying are having issues with that, and so I said you know, it must. It must suck to be filled with so much hate, and it from whatever side, like I'm just talking about how fucked up like everything is right now and I just that's all. I'm gonna leave it at.
Speaker 1:I think what we're gonna. I think what we're going to do. Um, we do have an upcoming guest. That will be probably our only time that we really talk politics. Um, she's expressed interest. Uh, one of our listeners have expressed interest about coming on to talk politics. She actually lives in Texas and has a lot to say. Actually, her TikTok is Jaquita for district. First of all, her name is Jaquita, and when I say this woman is as intelligent as possible, she was supposed to be a guest on during the primaries and unfortunately our schedules we weren't really recording during that time. Also, I know that there's another listener out there that has expressed interest we talking about rent and things of that nature. You are still in the queue. So I would let you guys know that you are still in the queue. We haven't forgotten about you. We just be forgetting about the podcast. Don't we be forgetting about the podcast?
Speaker 3:don't really forget about the podcast well, that's what it appears to seem like, because I will not let you, I will not let you say that we don't forget, we don't forget, we never forget, yeah, we never very busy people.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, god, thank blessings, all blessings, um. Speaking of blessings, um, I was trying to figure out when and how we can, like, curve into this. Did you want to do the amazon thing today? No, no, we can do it next amazon, something we can do whenever okay, I mean it's prime day, but they're not sponsoring this, this, this uh they're not.
Speaker 3:They're not sponsoring this conversation.
Speaker 2:They're not.
Speaker 3:They're not Amazon. You would like to sponsor?
Speaker 2:us. I mean gladly you can give me some of my money back.
Speaker 1:Okay, so I did want to say this, and I think that this is where this conversation was birthed from. We've all been bombarded for the summer, as we are, as we all know that everybody can't be outside. Everybody ain't got the funds to go to another concert because everybody's on the tour right now, but I will say that I've had the amazing opportunity to see.
Speaker 1:Janet the entire Demetia Jo Jackson finally in concert for the Together Again tour and it was just such an amazing feeling and when I say thanks to blessings, it's good to be in a space now where you can for me, where I can be like oh, this is how much it costs, okay, I got it, let's go, and without me worrying about what other bills need to be paid, because I've been responsible and taking care of things and being an adult, oh an adult Right by yourself. By myself in New york, you know?
Speaker 3:no, no, I meant like by yourself, because I don't want to do it.
Speaker 1:He said let me let me clarify okay.
Speaker 1:so my best friend, she called me and she, she and I or best friend, shout out to you prissy. Um, not only because the first day we met she fed me therefore you don't feed the animals and I never went anywhere um, but we both have such an amazing love for jenna jackson that we originally bonded over janet and then it just slowly creeped and became like best friends. So who else would she uh call when she was able to get some tickets? But me and we went and it was amazing. I mean like amazing, and I do want to say this before we even really get into the subject.
Speaker 1:Guys, I'm about to ramble a little bit Morning. I'll put a timestamp so you can fast forward if you want to. I don't care what nobody says. Number one Janet looks amazing, okay. Number two her mic was on. So okay, and it was on, and it was, and surprisingly like it, she wasn't. You know, I hate when people talk about how she whispers, um, because she, she just has a higher pitch voice. That's all it is and it's. She still sounds beautiful when she sings, um, but I did want to say this I never understood how people can see an artist or go somewhere and get so flustered that they start crying, until I saw janet. Why are you making that face?
Speaker 1:no, I'm listening well, like you're trying to push out a fart here we go, continue on with your story, sir, okay, I, I mean because I just I never understood it, like when people say, oh, like, okay, you know, here she go. When beyonce is on stage and people are losing their minds, or when the king of pop was alive and still is the only king of pop. Screw whoever said that. Uh, harry styles is the new king of pop. I don't know what crack y'all are on who said that?
Speaker 1:they did, and whoever the fuck they is need to take their ass back to the you know drawing board. Okay, but, um, like you know, just walking in there and just people just crying and I, just I, I had such an amazing time. They, we had seats that were purchased, um, and so they, we bought it. We went to newark, the presidential center, the stuff they bought us, this, these, these seats that didn't exist. So I don't know how many concerts have, they didn't exist means it.
Speaker 1:We were row d section. We were section something, row d. Where is my ticket? It's up there, um, section d. I was sitting in a row ahead of them and the row that I was sitting in existed, the row that they were sitting in the letters. Like they pulled those seats. We were in the. We were in the back of the floor seats, um and I. I know that everybody wants to get a good seat, but I'm trying to tell y'all my experience the best seats in the house, if you're not sitting directly in front and can see the artist, like really good, you need to sit on the floor in the way, in the back where the dj booth is or wherever that the the booth is where they're, where they're filming everything from afar, because there's that. It's just basically a dance floor and you can just enjoy yourself and not worry about people left to you, people to your right of you. That's my own suggestion, um, I don't know if. How many concerts, how many concerts have you guys been to?
Speaker 2:Not that many.
Speaker 3:Maybe a year tour.
Speaker 1:Okay, Blair, we're going to change that. Who do you want to see in concert?
Speaker 2:Oh, I already bought my ticket for what I want to see. I'm going to see Usher in October. Oh, okay, I'm so hyped.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, where are you going to see him at?
Speaker 2:In Texas.
Speaker 1:That's right. I think you did say that before, okay.
Speaker 2:But I've seen both on the runs and maybe like a couple other things here or there, but yeah, not that many concerts.
Speaker 1:So what about you? What about you Chris? What about you Black, chris? What about you black?
Speaker 3:well, I mean, I don't know what I'm gonna see next. Um, I did see um when you had mentioned it. I did start to look up tickets for for janet and then I was like I don't know if I'm gonna be able to fit something in anytime soon. So I don't know what. I don't know what the next thing is that I'm gonna go see I will actually go see her again if you want to yeah, but how long is she in concert for it?
Speaker 1:to the end of the summer, everybody's in concert. Until the end of the summer, everybody's trying to get there everybody out here getting their money.
Speaker 1:This okay, my cousins just went to jacksonville to see the art of the all the swv escape, 702, total and maya um, and so the base is also originally I'm scrolling circling back to this conversation was a conversation that my cousin and I shout out to you, rachel. Uh, we're having about like being in the moment, and not just like for concerts in general, but just like being in the moment to enjoy life, instead of always worrying about like sharing it on social media, making videos and or, just, you know, worrying about tomorrow. What does it mean to actually like be in the moment? To actually like be in the moment? So my questions, my first question to you guys and to you listeners you guys can, you know, chime in whenever, however you choose to you know the answers to the questions we always say at the end it's there you can find us.
Speaker 1:But like, how do you or do you think that you live in the moment? So, if you do, how do you do it? If you don't, what do you do instead?
Speaker 3:So it's funny, my dad sent something to the family group chat earlier today about screen time that children have on electronic devices these days and how they should be limited and how that actually improves the way that they perceive the world, the way that they interact with the world, their quality of life. So for me to kind of rip a page out of that book, even with, even without seeing that what I try and do is I try and give myself a set time when I'm actually doing video or photos, cause I think like that's what's going on in this world right now, when it comes to social media, everybody wants to record something and there's nothing wrong with that. But I think that we become so involved with that that we don't actually just experience and you miss out on the little stuff that happens in between. Whatever event is going on, right, so they might, they might focus on something, but you didn't see the little kid laughing or you didn't see, see, you know the trick or the stunt that somebody did on a bike. Because you're taking photos or some of someone else, you're not taking it all in.
Speaker 3:And so in order to live in the moment I think that I've been I had to come to an agreement with myself and just say I'm going to record some stuff, but if I don't cash all of it, that's okay too, and I don't think a lot of people do that, not these days the phone with the recording device on it gives a level of security as to, okay, well, whatever I didn't get right now, I can go back and look at the video later and see what I missed or relive what I experienced, you know, at that time.
Speaker 2:Um, I think like this idea or this um practice of living in the moment has become more, uh, a part of our vernacular, because we, being the older um generation excuse me.
Speaker 1:We welcome being the older generation than the Gen Zers.
Speaker 2:You know, we know what life was like without cell phones. We know what life was like without TikTok, without, you know, social media and all of these things. We know what life was like without it. So we have a different experience as to what is fulfilling for us. So I'm hesitant to say that, like you know, the children of today are, you know, missing out because they're not having the same experience that we had. They're having a different experience.
Speaker 2:Um, and that's not to benefit from some of the experience that we had absolutely, but also vice versa. Maybe we could benefit from some of the experience that they're having. I think there's a lot of like give and take here oh yeah.
Speaker 3:No, that's not to compare and contrast and I'm sorry if that came off like that that's not to compare and contrast where my mind kind of went yeah, yeah, no, I I don't think that's not to compare and contrast.
Speaker 3:I think the different generations and the different people and different cultures and different races, they have no social strengths. You know where you're sitting down, you're trying to talk to them and they don't want to have a conversation and they don't want to do this. They don't want to do that grew up and the things that we did, we had to like really build for on that to try and get to the points that we're at right now. And I think, like you know and that's just like one example and everybody's not going to be like that but I think that living in the moment is really just taking into account what you need to just step back on, and for me I think it's media. Sometimes I don't need to record every single thing.
Speaker 2:I think we are definitely both on the same page, like I think we definitely both think that it's important to have a lived experience as opposed to having a recorded experience. But I think the reason for that is because of just the way that we were brought up. You know, like we find authentication and we find, like true value and integrity in not having, you know, the phone in your face 24 seven, because that's not what we know, that's not what we're, that's not what's true to us. It feels fake to us because that's not what we you know, that's not how, that's not how we came up. So it is important for us to have like a more lived experience than being on the phone all the time or whatever other distraction is out there. So it's just to just kind of get back to like what PJ was saying. I think like it's all dependent on what personally makes you feel like you're getting value out of the experience that you're having, and I think that that can be different for everybody.
Speaker 1:you're muted it's showing up, says hey, excuse me, hello, you are muted now, but uh it. I'm curious. Number one did y'all see the whole situation with Busta Rhymes?
Speaker 5:And Busta's not content with the scenario where you're now standing up, but you're looking at him through your phone screen and recording a video that you're never going to watch ever again.
Speaker 4:Hey yo f*** them camera phones too. Let's get back to interacting like humans. Put them weird-ass devices down.
Speaker 5:I ain't from that era.
Speaker 4:It was yeah. Put your phone free hands, where I can see them.
Speaker 5:Women and children were not spared.
Speaker 4:At least he called beautiful queen.
Speaker 5:Get up too. At least he called her beautiful queen.
Speaker 4:Look, the reason why there will be zero tolerance for bulls**t energy in here is because this is my first time in New Orleans at the f**king 38th anniversary of the Ashes Festival.
Speaker 5:If you notice, there's still people sitting down.
Speaker 4:That's right. This is my first time, this is my brother's first time and it's my other brother's first time. That's right. Make me feel like we home.
Speaker 5:Is this what you want, busta? Turn up, turn up and over the show. So yeah, that rallying cry was after the first song of Busta's set. I looked at the rest of his set, which he ran through 11 more songs in about 25 minutes. That was pretty much Busta's approach with the crowd the entire time. I need silence.
Speaker 4:Everybody shut up Now. Everybody do me one favor in unison Make some noise.
Speaker 5:Not quite as intense as yelling at people like he was going to break their neck if they didn't stand up. He was a bit more playful with the crowd the rest of the time. The problem is this.
Speaker 4:We don't use special effects. We don't need special effects Because we are the special effects yeah right, this was at the Essence Festival at Essence you know them, essence, people was looking at it like so here's my thing.
Speaker 1:There are two points to it that I like to make. Possibly third but I'm not going to hog the whole thing for three points. One point is about and I think we've talked about this before, and this is genuine knowledge about what your brain retains when you're physically presently in the moment of something. It actually remembers it, unless you like, have dementia or whatever but it it doesn't just not remember the situation that happened, and maybe you won't remember it verbatim, but you'll remember the feeling, the emotion, the adrenaline that you, you experienced in that moment, when you're in the moment, and you'll be able to retain it or just think about it, or even dream about it more if you're in it, instead of worrying about, because I've been to concerts where I was one of those people that I spent most of the time, maybe on an Instagram live or Facebook live or whatever. Have you trying to show other people as well as maybe making a video here for myself? And then I'm like wait a minute, did they sing this song? Did they do this? And I don't remember because I spent more time trying to get the perfect shot, the perfect angle. And then there's the other point that I remember I went to see, you know, one of my favorites, rassan patterson, and he was doing at city winery and somebody was sitting in the front row and they had on the pair of glasses that you can record with and you, as they were wearing it, they look like.
Speaker 1:They look like what chris's glasses looked like, right, but so. But that corner part has a little light to let you know that it's recording. And in the midst of his, in the middle of his whole performance, he stopped his performance and and and brought up the fact that that, you know he's like that's whack, man. You know they're artists. Artists don't make music the way they used to, don't get paid for the music that they made the way they used to.
Speaker 1:Now, if we spend so much time trying to post everything and share everything, then why would someone? These are different arguments. Right, I see your face. But why would someone want to go to see an artist if you can just scroll and find it, even though it's like? Example, I didn't want to watch any of the beyonce renaissance tour until I saw it and I, since I didn't see it, at least blair and I went to see the movie and that was close enough for me, um, so it was still like a brand new experience, um, and. But there are people that I feel like I need to go. All I need to do is go to youtube and there it goes. And now you're taking money out of these artists mouths who, regardless of how much money you may think they have or they think're making, they're not making as much money as they used to because we're the money. It's just. Streaming is not doing what you know what it's supposed to when it comes to artists appreciation.
Speaker 2:No-transcript who's sitting?
Speaker 2:at a concert in general but I am but so I, I guess like this is just me either playing devil's advocate or straddling the fence. I think it's important for each person, each individual person, to know what makes a fulfilling experience for them. Again, we're all going to have a difference of opinion, because I'm sure there's many people that are going to say, like, oh, I can be on my phone and enjoy the moment. At the same time too, a lot of us might disagree, you know, be like. Well, you can't have a full experience with both.
Speaker 2:Like with Red saying with nieces and nephews and people being so transfixed on the phone that they're literally missing everything that's sensory going on around them. And to us we're like you're missing out on what the actual experience is, but to them it might mean something completely different. You know me personally. I feel like I have a pretty good balance of being out in the world and not being confined or, you know, focused on what's going on in the world through wireless fidelity. I don't even know if that's what Wi-Fi stands for, but we're going to go with that Sidebar. Does anybody know what Wi-fi actually really stands for? Is it wireless fidelity? Am I right?
Speaker 4:let's google.
Speaker 1:Let's go to our good girlfriend google in the moment, wi-fi means I'm mad, because I was like I know the answer and I'm all like wait wireless blair was right as she's got her out.
Speaker 2:Hands on your knees Now anyway.
Speaker 1:I never knew that you learn something new every day Shout out to.
Speaker 2:that just happened. That's how I learned it.
Speaker 3:But yes, I think that it's important.
Speaker 2:I feel like I have a good balance of being able to like experience the moment, capture pieces from that experience with my phone, but not be fully distracted by the capability of my right.
Speaker 1:That's the part and I think that, and so I think a lot of that also has something to do with our attention spans and adhd, and well, that's a social media thing too right.
Speaker 2:It's literally dumbing us down, while it's also educating us at the same time with fake news and fake news our attention span is like the size of a gnat I don't think.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, like I've been, I've been there are attention span, there are, are ADHD exercises you can do to actually really help your, your, what you, what you retain, uh, what you, and I think I I've been actually much better at it, like the train has really been staying in the station. I don't know, guys, you haven't noticed or not, or maybe it's not noticeable, but I think that I've been doing much better with being able to stay focused, and I think a lot of that has to do with where I wanted to guide this conversation in a second about what it means to like be in the moment and understand what's everything that's going on, sensory wise, and actually like looking, smelling, tasting, getting back to our melanated senses, all of that beautiful stuff that actually makes what's going on now important to you, versus trying to remember it because you're looking at it.
Speaker 3:Now you versus trying to remember it, because you're looking at it now.
Speaker 1:You were about to say kegels. Oh, and so mind kegels sidebar. If anybody wants to do kegels, the best song to do kegels to is janet jackson's throb. Okay, don't take a pause. These are, these are pro tips. Yeah, these are protests you want to keep it tight and right.
Speaker 1:These are PJ's tips for keeping it tight and right. Put on Throb and do your Kegels to the beat, telling you right now, fast forward. But, like I used to have conversations okay, now we're shifting out of concerts because I think it also just applies to a lot of different things about what it means to stay in the moment. I used to have conversations with one of my exes and he used to always say things like you know, you can't always just think of the moment. Like life is more than just moments. You have to, like think about the future, you have to think about the past. Like you can't live in the moment, every moment, because if you're living in the moment, you're not setting yourself up for your future.
Speaker 1:And I still don't agree with that statement because I still think, especially working in funeral environments, understanding what, what these moments mean. Like we spend so much time, in my opinion, we spend so much time thinking about the future that we lose what's happening in the moment. Like even like us doing this podcast, like every single time we get on the mic and we haven't seen each other in person in a long time, or even on the mic in a long time. Like these are moments that I cherish. You know, and I think and I know the feeling is mutual most of the time with you, chris. I know it's always mutual for you, blair.
Speaker 3:I'm glad you, Chris. I know it's always mutual for you, Blair.
Speaker 1:I'm glad you clarified that, you know, but I, I, I just I don't know, I don't know. I just I think that there's a, there's an idea of like people don't stay in the moments anymore Like they used to, in not even just, like I said, not just concerts, but just in life in general, like we're so busy trying to keep planning that we're losing these moments I think it's a balance thing like it's, like I you know me, I'm all about a plan, but I also understand that you can't be so actively planning that you missed out on living yeah
Speaker 3:um I think. I think that part of the problem is why it's so hard to define. This is because it's about perspective and what you think is the good amount and sometimes, because you're in it think is the good amount. And sometimes, because you're in it in that moment where you feel like you've done enough either in the moments or thought about enough stuff in the past or thought enough stuff in the future, you don't realize that sometimes that you might have a deficiency, right?
Speaker 3:I think that I've lived personally. I think now I've lived more times in the moment than I've ever done in my entire life, right? But I know for a fact younger me let's just go back about 10 years ago was not living in the moment. I was constantly like, well, how do I do this or how do I do that? And even sometimes in the past, why did I do this, why did I do that? And so the goal is to, I think, really find a way. A's always thinking about planning, because those bring her good quality in the present moments, as opposed to her being or feeling like she's in disarray and doesn't know what's going on or what's going to happen. So I think that's part of the problem. I think we feel sometimes that we know what's right for what's what's supposed to be in the moment, and then I want to say we probably get it half right sometimes, because there's definitely some people that don't know or don't live in the moment.
Speaker 2:That's the other part of it too, is I think there's.
Speaker 2:So we as human beings can get really rigid about routine because it's what's comfortable, but the thing that we have to remember is you can change it up at any time right at any time, like there's nothing written or decreed that you have to keep you know, know, doing things the way that you've been doing them, because that's that's what you had set out to do or you intended to do, or what have you. The other thing I was going to say was, I think, part of the reason why, like you read, you were saying that like you feel like now you live much more in the moment than you ever did before, especially when you were in your 20s. I think that's also just kind of like a society thing. I think that that's kind of like pounded into us. It's like when you're younger, you gotta plan for the future. You know, you gotta think about, you gotta always be looking forward to the future and planning for the future. And now that we're quote unquote, in that future, this is the time that we were planning for. So now we're actually living it. Now we're like living the life that we set up for ourselves.
Speaker 2:I remember maybe it was, it was a few years ago, maybe about like 10 or so years ago, but I remember I made this really conscious like effort to, because so so often I felt like I was just kind of going through the motion of things. And I think that that's when I realized that there's a real difference between living life and experiencing life like doing things, because it's like, okay, this is what I'm, I go to work, I, I hang out with friends, I, you know, I go to the gym, like these are things that I do. But there's a deeper level in how you're actually experiencing those things, and I think that I made the decision to kind of focus more on the experience of things than the actual like practicality of doing whatever it was that I was doing. So that means and this is your point, pj but that means like thinking about what am I getting out of this moment? What do I like about this moment? What don't I like about this moment? What am I going to remember about, you know, this experience that I'm having right now? What can I do right now to further enhance these feelings? That kind of thing, just like being able to kind of go through those different thoughts to increase the experience in the moment.
Speaker 2:And if I ever and this is the planner in me if I ever got to have a similar experience again, what would I want to do again and what would I want to change? What would I want to do differently? Oh, I went to Coney Island for the first time and you know I rode the wonder wheel and it was great and I, you know, the, the, the. But the next time I come maybe I'll do this or maybe I'll do that, like kind of thing. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I think, I think, um, you brought, you brought up two words that are standing out to me, which is one is practicality and one is experience. I think that the experience is always going to trump practicality, and that's not to say that you shouldn't be practical. I think that practicality makes sure that things remain safe and, within a certain boundary, for you to manage the way that you need to manage it. So, for example, blair, I'm using you as, again, because out of the three of us, you're probably the most organized of us.
Speaker 1:So there's no probably about that. There's no probably. She is. She's the best of us.
Speaker 3:I don't know about all that.
Speaker 3:Take your flowers, okay, but you know the practicality by you planning allows you going back to what I was saying before, allows you to have those in-the-moment experiences that just run smoothly, no problem. But if you're too practical, you never get anything done. So like, for example, I'm planning trips. I kept saying I'm going to plan, I'm going to plan, I'm going to plan. I want you to know I drag these trips out down to the widow. I just have to book it. I just have to book it and just experience. And what will happen is that when you experience it, you go oh, I really like this, I love this, I will never do this again, I love this, I will never do this again. And so that becomes in sense for you to say you can't be in your phone all the time because you are not picking up the experiences that you need you know, and so it.
Speaker 1:I thought I was glad you didn't go too far because I was like. This reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from any television show and, blair, I know you can, you, you'll be right here with me but one of my favorite quotes is from andy, from the office, and it was there when he said I wish there was a way to know that you're in the good old days before you actually left them. You know, and it's just so funny because we were in these moments and you'd be like yo in college, like, oh my god, those were the good old days. But do we really see? You know, blair has a beautiful scrapbook, and so do you, chris. You have a beautiful like a memorabilia of everything. I don't really have that, so mine is based on the memories that I do try to hold locked in, and I because back then I was so like self-conscious and I wasn't doing a lot of like pictures and videos and things like. Well, we weren't doing videos back then because they didn't really exist, you know, unless you had a camcorder, jesus.
Speaker 2:Christ, I had a camcorder.
Speaker 1:You didn't hear me say Jesus Christ God.
Speaker 3:Lord, today's keyword is old.
Speaker 2:Camcorder. I think every episode going forward forward we need to find what the handheld in front of it yeah a handheld, a handheld handheld quarter handheld handyman sony.
Speaker 1:Um, but like that, right there, when I heard that quote, um, it, just, it, just, it just always hits me because it's like we never know we're in these kind of moments because we're not really we're living them. But later down the road, like, are we gonna remember it because we lived it or are we gonna remember it because we've recorded it, you know? And when we watch it back, does it bring us that same feeling versus when we think about it and remember it because it's just for us?
Speaker 2:So then that kind of becomes like what the solution is is it's all about, like, how you like I was saying before, like you can appreciate the capability of being able to record and film and go live and all the things that we can do now. But there comes a different level experience when you're not relying on that, when you're not reliant on oh, I have to record this or oh, I have to, you know, go live right now because I, this is, it's, this is how the memory is going to be. You know, if we stay focused on the fact that these things can be used to enhance our own cognitive experience, then you have a much better chance of being able to have what we three would consider a more well-balanced lived experience.
Speaker 1:It's what we three would consider. We are the council.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to be like super diplomatic because I can't say what other people like, what other people are gonna. You know, truly, other people have different lived experiences than we do. Other people, you know like, live in the moment differently than we do. We have a very specific, you know like, thought as to how it's best done, but that's because of the experiences that we had in the childhood, that we had in the way that we grew up and the technology that we had access to or didn't have access to growing up. So the children and the Gen Z of today, Gen alphas now.
Speaker 2:And the Gen alphas. Good Lord, they're.
Speaker 1:Wait till we get to Gen betas.
Speaker 2:I'm not, I can't. I mean I pray to, but you know still.
Speaker 5:Lord have mercy.
Speaker 2:I can't say what living in the moment looks like for them. Only they can say that. That's why I say like from our experience or from our perspective.
Speaker 3:It would be interesting to talk to different generations to see what that looks like, because I think sometimes it's so. You know people's perspectives generationally or just. It doesn't even matter Generation, it can be any group, but any group is so different and so far removed. It's kind of like that. That video that I got I think I was telling you guys about a couple of episodes ago where the um, they were in a high school and they were recording and they were asking the kids like how old is real old? And they were like 39 and then one kid was like 25. One kid said 25, you don't even know, you still got baby formula on your breath.
Speaker 1:You still shit and yella 25, please.
Speaker 3:So you know and I don't know.
Speaker 2:You can barely rent a car at 25.
Speaker 3:Listen, you can charge crazy insurance because you're so young. But I mean, I just think it's interesting because I don't think we would ever think that they would think that that's old. So it's.
Speaker 1:it's so funny because you know, as as now, like I walk into these spaces as a teacher and I deal with these, with these kids, and it's just like today, great example.
Speaker 1:So we were in the studio today and we were having some technical issues and I had someone, uh, from pe, from public equipment, come in and they were asking the person who was standing in behind the camera a question and he was so into it, but not completely into it, that he was when, when, when he, when let's just say his name was John, when John was asking Tyler a question, tyler, just, it was like Tyler was just blank, like he didn't, and he's, he's a very smart kid, so it's not like he's, you know, it was just, it was.
Speaker 1:It was weird because he was as he was, as John was explaining to him what he needed to do. He couldn't understand portion of it, partially because he was on his phone when he should not have been on his phone, right, and other part was he was trying to. Also because I know how his mind operates, you learn how all these kids, their, operate differently, especially from ours, especially what you just said, blair, based on all the experiences and the things that we've had available and they can do five different things at once, which they really can't, but they can just not. Well, depending on who's measuring what's well or what's not, um, it just it, just like it's just seemed to not click and it took him like ten minutes for him to remember the original question that was asked. For him to answer that question ten minutes later.
Speaker 1:I was going to experience this a lot with these kids.
Speaker 3:I was going to say that you, because I started pointing at you because you, out of the three of us, you work with kids and I was going to say you should. Anytime you have these generational questions, you should just ask them, just out of pure curiosity, because they're not even. They're not the kids that you're working with, they're not even gen z no, these are gen.
Speaker 1:These are all gen alphas these are gen alphas the kids that I'm working with right, right, come back, blair. I know it's rough and you came back because I laughed when you were talking about gen alpha. I was like you know what's so funny? I can't wait for we to get to gen iota gen iota goodnight that's why I just wanted to say this, so people can like finally leave us the fuck alone meanwhile.
Speaker 3:Meanwhile it's a slow pan out of our urn on somebody's fireplace oh no we are long
Speaker 1:gone. We are long gone.
Speaker 3:Origin Zeta oh my god, why am I laughing so hard?
Speaker 2:why, yes, why?
Speaker 1:but you know what I, especially today and now that you said that, I think I need to like reprogram myself with the expectations of how I approach them, because, literally, my god put your phone away. Okay, two minutes later it's back in your hand. It's like they just can't separate from it and they're paying attention, but they're not paying attention, but they're paying attention again. It took him 10 minutes to be able to, you know, like, understand what was asked of him before. And the reason why I say it took him 10 minutes was because, at the end of everything I asked him, I said and see, what I need for you guys to be able to is to be off your phone so you can do this, because when people ask you questions, you can't, even, you don't know how to answer the question.
Speaker 1:And example, tyler, you just said he said no, no, no. He asked me a, b and c and I. I meant to say x, y and z and I said why do you think you couldn't say it? He had no answer for that. So, there, there, there, there, you know there's, there's, there's things that and I mean maybe I want to have, like I would love to have um latasha on the show really talk about like education and um people, how, how do we really connect with these kids of these gen alphas and gen betas and don't go through it, don't.
Speaker 3:I told you you go the way that, we that we, that we connect is, you know, being on somebody's fireplace there's no.
Speaker 2:God it's so depressing.
Speaker 1:Don't end on that, let's not end on that, but you know, so I I'll. I'll close out with this and maybe you guys can add one of your own, if you, if you would like to, um, going through the comments of that whole situation with busser and people, and you can see that some people like I paid my money so I can do whatever it is I want to do with my money, which is very accurate. Do you pay? That's how you want to spend? You know, live in your moment, by all means, baby, do you, honey, do you? And then those that you know say, yeah, you can't be in, you can't be in two places at one time, because mentally you're, you're physically there, but mentally you're in your phone. That's very well, okay, that makes sense. Do you do whatever?
Speaker 1:I would like to say, as these recent years, especially since the pandemic, especially since working in the different environments I'm working in, now, I'm learning more and more what it really means to be living in the moment and appreciating the moment without any need for what's the word I'm looking for. How would you guys know? I didn't even say it yet.
Speaker 3:You say ditto, I said potato.
Speaker 1:but OK, we can use ditto too banana um, without any looking for any like when you, when you're the word you're, you're on stage and people are praising you. Applause, not applause. Come on, lady gaga. No um like recognition. Come on, lady Gaga. No Like recognition, without any in the moment being recognized for doing whatever it is that you're doing.
Speaker 2:Validation.
Speaker 1:Validation, you know, because I've learned how to validate and so being in the moment has really taught me how to validate myself.
Speaker 3:We valid.
Speaker 5:Is that like episode 2 or 3?
Speaker 1:that was early, that's early wait so, for those of you who don't know, if you dig way, way back one of all employees when she learned, when he told her son we valid. I'm saying this, you know why, and not just because it's recording this in the podcast, but that moment, these moments that we have while recording these things, they locked in my mind, not just because I can listen to them again, but that was hilarious, yeah, it was pretty funny, you know. So I I would say, try your best to figure out what works for you to live in the moment. And, you know, ask yourself what am I living in the moment? If I'm living in the moment, what does that mean? What happened today that makes me smile, make me sad or whatever the fuck? You know emotion you want to express. Why do I have to use profanity as I say this?
Speaker 4:we'll believe that no we won't but um, yeah, we don't believe it never.
Speaker 1:I always say I'm gonna do something when, when the episode plays and then don't I'm not. I'm not gonna talk about my mama and I'll cut that out and then the whole segment is it there, and then it'd be in there. I'm like PJ, she's never going to listen, I always tell her.
Speaker 2:Every time he says he's not, and then he puts it. I'm just like there it is.
Speaker 1:From the first, and that'd be the first time she's like you know what? Let me check out, see what my no, she won't do it anyway. But anyway, my question to you guys, the listeners, and you can chime in if you want to. Are you living in the moment? And if so, how? And if not, what can you do to change that Do?
Speaker 2:you want to change it. I think it takes a lot of energy to consciously live in the moment. The way that we are presuming and kind of putting up on this pedestal as to what the definition of living in the moment is it low-key, kind of sounds exhausting to me.
Speaker 4:Really.
Speaker 2:Really is it low-key kind of sounds exhausting to me really, really I I think, like the way that I'm thinking about it in the sense that god I'm living already. Leave me alone it's like you gotta make sure you're getting the most out of it.
Speaker 2:So it just feels like so much like pressure, like you gotta make sure that you're getting the most out of this moment. You're're really experiencing it, you're really having like a full, like well-rounded experience. You're here, you're doing it, you're doing it. Make sure you're doing it, don't don't get distracted. You got to make sure you're doing it. It feels like a lot, and for me, I think it's more so, just like, just like what we were saying before, am I enjoying myself? Am I not enjoying myself? Just really just kind of taking inventory as to like what you're feeling in that moment. I think that that is the place to start when it comes to living in the moment, reflecting and taking inventory.
Speaker 3:I'm being more spontaneous and I'll just leave it at that well, all right, I can't hold this, and I'm trying to, but I can't.
Speaker 1:The best time for you to realize, in my opinion, that if you're living in the moment is when you're recording yourself having sex. And the reason why I'll say this and I try not to, because I you're making a face.
Speaker 3:It was, it was bound to come out, because I was like what is he about to say right now?
Speaker 1:but like are you living in the moment or are you more concerned with what it looks like? That's the reason. That's where I'm coming from with it like that was, like that was justifiable.
Speaker 3:So, which one is living in the moment.
Speaker 1:Which one is living in the moment you just I mean you're recording it.
Speaker 2:But if you're like really trying to be performative and you know, what it is you know what it is have you seen the episode of?
Speaker 1:Friends where they watch the tape of Ross and Rachel having sex, and that's when Rachel gets pregnant.
Speaker 2:No, no, I didn't watch Friends. Well, spoiler alert Rachel gets pregnant and Ross is the father.
Speaker 2:Spoiler alert but there's this moment, so everything is like leading up to all of us. So then they finally find out that, yes, ross is the dad rachel knew, but like none of the other friends knew. So like, yes, now we and the audience and everybody knows that rachel's the dad or ross is the dad. The next episode is where they're debating like who came on to who? And they're like, oh, I can settle this, I have it on tape. And everybody's like what the fuck do you mean? You have it on tape. So they blah, blah, blah. They have it on tape. You go through the whole episode. At the very end of the episode it's the blah blah meme.
Speaker 1:Do I need to hear the blah blah blah?
Speaker 2:go ahead, I'm sorry I mean, I'll tell you the blah blah later. The audience is probably familiar with the blah blah blah. I'll to hear the blah blah blah. Go ahead, I'm sorry. I mean I'll tell you the blah blah blah later. The audience is probably familiar with the blah blah blah. I'll tell you the blah blah blah later. But at the end of the episode, ross and Rachel just the two of them decide that they are going to watch the tape of them having sex, just because they're curious to see, like, what it looks like. So they pop the tape in, they start watching it and then they start giving each other little compliments. They're like she's like have you been working out? He's like I had been working out. Yes, I had. And then he's like that's a really nice tan you have. She's like yeah, I had just went to the beach. And then you know they start having sex and like and you know they start having sex and like, oh, they start watching it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, that's not pretty.
Speaker 5:No, no, oh, no no, no, turn it off.
Speaker 2:Turn it off. I feel like that's the progression that you're talking about, pj, when it shifts from what do I look like, what do I look like, be conscious of what I look like into. You're not worried about what you look like anymore. You are in it and it looks. However, the fuck it looks.
Speaker 1:And, you know, some of my best sex has been not recorded. Okay, wait, we get there. On that note, guys, thank you for taking the next time. Thank you for taking time to listen to another episode of highly motherfucking melanated that's right the safe space to do whatever it is in your moment, whatever the fuck you feel like doing, because it's your moment to live. We can't tell you any otherwise.
Speaker 2:I like that.
Speaker 1:It's your moment, whatever the you feel like doing because it's your moment to live. We can't tell you any otherwise. I like that. It's your moment to live, not? I literally had a nikki minaj in my head like delete. Arms are not coming for me because, as always, you know, all right those things, those places we're here, we will we will make sure that we are being more consistent. The next episode after this will be about consistency. This one is coming out first, so we basically have an episode where it does it a lot switch ew, but yeah, I feel so naked without saying it, as always.
Speaker 1:Guys, you can follow us on social media. That's right.
Speaker 2:Do what feels right they can.
Speaker 1:I mean you can follow us. It's your choice, it's your moment. Do what you want to do. It's our moment. Decide whether we want to post on there or not.
Speaker 2:Uh so where can they find us? Pj highly melanated podcast both on instagram and tiktok yes, and, as always, if you'd like to send us a jolly old email, just go ahead and just put highlymelanatedpodcasts at gmailcom in your two box and we'll get it.
Speaker 3:And don't even think about it, just live in the moment. Come on over to Twitter, well, formerly known as Twitter, now known as x at h underscore melanated pod.
Speaker 1:There's actually will be. There actually is. I just lost the information sidebar. How responsible. But there's also a new way to stay in contact with us. There's a phone number. Next week you guys will have that information. You can get in. You can be in the moment and leave your messages there. Uh, if, yeah, if you can call us and you know you might write a letter. Maybe, maybe, who knows, you might want some advice from us. Maybe you just want to tell us how much you love us. Maybe you want to tell us how much you miss us. Maybe you want to tell us how much we've been. You know out of the moment because we haven't been recording, but we have been recording but maybe other moments.
Speaker 1:Maybe you want to share about moments that you've recorded when you were having sex. Either way, reach out to us.
Speaker 3:Or you could just say hi.
Speaker 2:Or you could just say hi On that note guys peace, love and. It's your moment.
Speaker 3:So live it right. Yeah, yeah, that works, thank you, bye.